Introverted thinking

I always found the sound of rain on my window amazingly calming. Just laying in bed listening to the rain fall down surrounded by my lovely pillow and blanket, knowing I am protected. This evening I am sitting with windows open just listening to the rain fall heavily on the asphalt and letting the new air in. The smell of rain is just fresh, new, a tad chilly. As if the cold broke through the wall of heat and let in new air. Like I can breath again.

I guess it is moments like these I treasure the most. Sitting with candy or a glass of redwine enjoying the new air breaking through the atmosphere. Allowing myself to think whatever I like and not having to answer to anyone or anything. Recharging my batteries for the weekend - so to speak. This weekend I am going to see a group of amazing friends, watch movies all weekend and eat some amazing food. Not that I am not looking forward to it. I do. I am looking forward to having my "social-batteries" recharged. It just only feels like that my "alone-batteries" needs recharging a lot more often than my "social"-ones.

I've always felt this way, it was just first as an adult I came to accept it. Accept that it was ok to be an introvert in an extrovert world. That it was ok to be awkward in large crowds. Sometimes me being awkward tend to look like I don't want to be approached. Talked to. It's not really the case. I am just not that good at talking in groups. So if you see me curled up in a corner, don't think that I don't want to talk or anything. I do. Just only to you and not 20 of your friends as well.

Anyway, as I sit here enjoying the sound of thunder fading away while philosophising on being introvert, a eagerness begins to emerge. A joy that I get to see some of my closest friends this weekend. I just needed the space. Time. And loneliness.


Being alone is not always a dangerous thing. Sometimes it is necessary I guess.